What a pathetic excuse for a man. He moved in with us and ran up a huge phone bill for sex calls and then moved out instead of doing the right thing and paying for them. Now I can't get phone service again and it's because of that lazy, smelly slab of blubber.
If you don't know him, beware. He is tall with a fat upper body and stupid, skinny legs, with nappy curly brownish hair. He looks like a blob from the waist up and a stick from the waist down. He has a fat stupid looking face and doesn't know how to shave. Because he doesn't know how to shave he has pus-filled acne that he refuses to do anything about. His fat, stupid cheeks are always flushed red, and if he does anything physical, like breathing, he breaks into a profuse sweat. And he smells like a dead, wet dog because he doesn't bathe and he walks everywhere, perpetuating the sweat problem, thus assisting the odor problem. Why does he walk everywhere? Because the stupid piece of shit doesn't have a f*ing drivers license. He still doesn't know how to drive and he's almost thirty.
He makes big plans for himself but he knows he isn't smart enough or driven enough to accomplish anything. He couldn't even graduate from high school. He wants to be in criminal justice-then he wants to be a navy seal, and then a marine, or army - he has delusions of grandeur about being in the military but the funny thing is he has been rejected so many times it isn't funny - for either being to f*ing fat or to f*ing weak or to f*ing blind. Who is he kidding anyway? He can't even run - when he does, you have to think to yourself, is this what an aneurysm looks like??? If he gets physically hurt, he wails like a five year old girl.incompetent? Yes, but don't be fooled. This asshole is a master manipulator and will do anything to farther himself (if that's possible) including lying, stealing, etc. Yes, he truly is the village idiot. But he knows enough to know how to play people's sympathies because he IS such a f*ing moron.
People look at his stupid, fat baby face and acne and see a retarded child, and they try to help him. I know because that is how i was suckered in. I thought to myself, this guy is retarded. I should help him to keep a roof over his head for a little while and then next thing I know, the job he said that he had doesn't exist and the 900 calls were pouring in. When I finally had enough and told him so, he skipped out on me, and I was left with a huge phone bill, unpaid utilities (as per our agreement), and a relatively new couch that now smells like ass because the fat fuck* cannot bathe himself or take care of himself. Hygiene is not a strong point with this one. And to top it off, I fed the fat bastard for the weeks he was here, and he eats like a pig at a trough, slopping food all over his face and clothes. God forbid that he should sneeze or have a cold... He lets the mucous fly and evidently saves the excess on the outer rims of his nostrils for later. He has no idea how to use a kleenex or napkin. And what's best about it all is that when you are looking at him incredulously over the table, embarassed as hell because your girlfriend has come over, he just smiles his stupid, fat, retarded smile, food caked on his pustule-covered face and boogers hanging from the tips of his six-inch nosehairs.
He is pleasantly numb to his bestial nature. If he lets his face appear in public like this, I don't want to think of what the unseen bits look like or how he takes care of those. And to think someone actually screwed him! What a desperate girl. Stupid, stupid girl. If he approaches you, he will try to play on your sympathies by playing the "no daddy" card or "mom is a bitch" card or even something about "grandma got shot by a hoodlum" card. He wants everyone to believe that he's had such a rough life, and he may have, but there comes a time (especially if you profess to be a man) in your life you have to suck it up and move on. Bathe. Get a job. Get a drivers license. Don't steal from people. You know, the basics.
The point of my story is that Jason Brant Hebert is a fat, stupid f* and no matter what innocent, hard-luck story he gives you, run the hell away. Stay far away from him. He is a seriously disgusting and mentally challenged guy (can I call him that? Not sure-how about a waste of human flesh) and you will be burned if you cater to him. At the very least, you will be left bitter and angry that you ever knew him and tolerated his stupidity, his bodily stink, and his ill-mannerisms for so long.
DavidShreveport, Louisiana
U.S.A.
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