I received a call from Political Survey Group. A recorded voice asked me to answer the survey, with the promise of a 3-day Caribbean Cruise. I was intrigued—I like political surveys, and the free Caribbean cruise enticement was so scam-tastic that I thought it'd be good for a laugh just to listen to their sorry pitch. The recorded voice asked several questions (was I registered to vote? Did I plan to vote? With what political party do I most identify?) and I entered in the corresponding 1 or 2. Then at the completion of the 3-question survey, I was transferred to Caribbean Cruise Lines. The CCL operator asked if I'd heard of their company. I hadn't. (Although I'd vacationed in the Bahamas only months before.) Well, Ms. S, CCL awards unbooked, otherwise empty cabins on cruises in the hopes that lucky vacationers will spread the word about how wonderful CCL is. They gave me the hard sell: a 3-day cruise for 2-4 guests could be mine, all expenses paid except alcoholic beverages, gratuities and a $59 port fee—which I should pay now, Now, NOW! To reserve my cabin on the free cruise. I toyed with them, wasting their time with my questions about their flim flam claims: How can you reserve my cabin if I haven't decided what date I'll be sailing? How can you pay my port fee when I haven't yet scheduled the cruise, and thus don't know the disembarkment date? They bumped me up the food chain to another salesman, who urged me to pay the port fee now, on the phone, or risk that the port fee might increase in the future. Oh, I get it: you want my credit card number? Yes, Ms. S! I told them you must think I'm an idiot. No no we just want to award you the cruise. Well, then just send me an email, and I'll look over your requirements, I told them. The 2nd salesmen said he'd send me an email, and I'm still waiting for it to appear in my inbox—just like I'd be waiting on a refund or a cruise if I'd fallen for this.
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