I see a add in the paper for what looks like a cool job. I am heavily tattooed so sometimes it is hard for me to get a job. However I do not regret choosing to represent my self this way. I am smart educated and intelligent and I have strong work ethic.
So I go in there and without telling me very much they tell me they want me to come back for a second interview. So I go in two days later for what now appears to be an orientation of some sort. I am led to a room with 7 or 8 other people. First of all they have rap music playing very load on a big stereo. One of the guys comes in and turned it off and I say, "thank God". He says, "you don't like that? And I say, "no I listen to metal and hardcore". I think I start to irritate him.
Then he puts on a Chris Farley video and tells us to copy a bunch of stuff off this board which includes some states, cities and a bunch of peoples names including Larry Hahn. We sit there for 20 minutes so I go out side where I find the two of them smoking cigarettes and i say, "what are we doing? I can watch TV at home, I came to get a job.
By now the one guy is definitely irritated with me. He says, " we will be getting started in a moment. Finally he comes in and by talking about this loser Larry Hahn. He goes on to say how "we love Larry, how much money Larry has and how big larry's house is.
First of all I don't care about Larry. I donut know Larry and I care to know Larry. All ready by what this guy is saying about Larry, Larry seems like a show boating, glutinous, greedy a*e. I'm not trying to be Larry. He goes on to say how much money we will be making, The office we will get in a couple of weeks and that we will have people working under us.
I'm a little suspicious at this point but I continue to stay and listen. I have traveled and lived all over the us and have also been to Europe and Asia which has enabled me to interact with many different people on many different levels. One thing I learned from these experiences is how to smell b*t before it comes out of the hiney.
After hearing about how much money Larry and the rest of the clan is making I start to pick up on certain things, for example: if the owner has so much money why is it that the office looks like people squat there after hours. And the clothes the guy was wearing were cheap, tacky and straight from the eighties. His hair wasn't even shaped up. Like I said before, i'm not about showing off with expensive things but for someone who said they made a lot of money I wasn't seeing it.
He goes on to say how we will not be selling anything or going door to door and stuff like that. However he will not let any of us ask questions. But i keep on asking anyway. I'm brutally honest and speak my mind. I cant sit there and let some one feed me crap without calling them out on it.
By the end he starts to come out with it real good now. At this point I finally realize who this is now. Its the losers who walk around and sell fake perfume and cologne out of a duffel bag. I'm not a 17 year old kid who is just trying to get up money for a sack of weed for the weekend. I am a hard working, 34 year old man who also has a beautiful fiance in school who counts on me to provide for her and make sure she is comfortable so that she can concentrate on school. I have blue collar tattooed on my leg for a reason. I love good, hard, honest work. It's good for your soul ya know?
Now at this point i'm real pi*ed off at the fact that i just wasted 2 and a half hours on this crap when I could of been seeking gainful employment instead. I raise my hand and he finally lets me say something. Here comes the what I think is the funny part. I ask, " why would someone buy fake perfume out of a duffel bag from some random hero in a parking lot.
I continue to say to him and the rest of the fools, "when one of you come up to me and ask what kind of fragrance I wear? I think to myself, what a d*e bag! At this point the guy goes from 0 to extremely pi*ed in a matter of a quarter second. He yells at me with a red face, "are saying the people that work here are d*e bags and he storms out of the room. I can hear him yelling down the hall at me, "come out here right now!
At this point i'm thinking i'm going to end up stabbing this poor b*d in his face. He disappears though. The other guy says what happened and asks me to come into his office and sit down. I'm like no thanks, this definitely is not for me. I would set myself on fire before I would go home and tell my fiance and my crew that i'm selling perfume out of a duffel bag! I would surely be kicked off the island for this. Thank you for reading this and beware of the Larry cult.
Mark
Charlotte, North Carolina
U.S.A.
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