I received an e-mail that invited me to join a fabulous poetry contest. The grand prize is $10,000—wowzer! After reading all the consumer complaintss posted here by victims of Poetry.com I knew I was a shoe in to get VIP status the second I hit reply. Naturally I'm selected to go into a book since I'm such a poetry genius.
Here are the next things that will happen:
1. They will want me to purchase the over priced book with my award-winning poem inside—wow, me a published author compliments of Poetry.com. Now that's classy!
2. I will win many awards, ribbons, trophies, plaques, or whatever these putty heads sell. Of course I will have to pay for these awards—big money.
3. I will be invited to a large convention of poets—award-winning poets like me. Naturally this convention will cost me. But my poem will be read publicly! What they don't tell you is that hundreds or thousands (if they get a good sucker haul) show up for this convention. They shuffle you into little rooms where you each take turns (if they even have time) for you all to stand up and read your poem. These fraudsters make a fortune off this vanity fraud convention.
Later in the night they give away the grand prize to their very own shills. A very magical evening to be sure.
Here is my award winning poem:
Ode to the Putty Heads at Poetry.com
I have a lump of putty
This putty is my friend
My putty has been a true pal to me
like no other pal has been.
I use my putty everywhere,
I carry it with me often.
Sometimes I leave it in the sun
where it can soften.
You probably think I'm a putty fool,
bragging about my putty friend.
But there are much bigger fools,
who will soon get it in the end.
Those are the morons who,
work and run Poetry.com.
You see it is these putty heads
who are the biggest cons.
Don't be jealous, sometimes the muse just takes me.
FraudChick
Ethics, Arkansas
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