My wife received a letter from a collection agency in the mail yesterday from the 'Law Offices of Donald S Burak' claiming that we owed $453 on a Citibank account that she opened 7 years ago. The only problem is that my wife never opened an account with Citibank - at least none that she's aware of! So, I call the toll free number on the letter to figure out what this mysterious debt is. The first thing I notice is that the female who answers the phone is very blunt and keeps cutting me off. Suddenly I realize that this kind of company must deal with thousands of people who actually DON'T pay their debts. With this in mind, I kind of put up a mental shield because I know it's not going to be easy to get any information/service. She connects me to my account manager.
So I get connected to the famous Jason McClain that everyone has to talk to. This guy has an amazing @$hole persona. First, he lets me know that I've interrupted him and doesn't have time to explain 'your own credit problems to you.' No matter how nice your tone or how nice you ask, he just tells you that you owe a great deal of money and how disgusting you are for not taking care of your finances and since we obviously aren't cooperating he's just going to go ahead with legal proceedings and blah... Blah... Blah. He's really rude and won't let you get a word in. He's really agressive. After five minutes of being really nice (me not Justin) and trying to get some information about my mysterious debt, he tells me he has too many other calls to deal with and if I'm not paying my debt he's simply going to forward this for legal action.
I'm telling you I was shocked at his incredible rudeness, but I was also kind of amazed. Here's a guy who has to act like a mean @$ for 8 hours a day every day he goes to work. Suddenly my job doesn't look so bad. What a waste of a life. I'm tempted to call back just to hear his rants again. I want to record him and play it for friends.
Anyway, I'm trying to resolve the mysterious debt in writing because calling is absolutely worthless. The whole existence of this collection company is to scare people into paying a debt - whether they actually owe it or not. They are not a service to assist you in obtaining information. They are not there to 'help.' They are only concerned in confusing and scaring you into providing your bank information so that they can wire your money to their account. JUST KEEP THIS IN MIND WHEN YOU CALL!
So, on those days when my job is stressing me out and my wife hates me and my car breaks down... I will still give thanks and remember that it can always be worse - I could be Justin 'the @$' McClain.
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