For years I functioned on the Verizon land line/DSL combo. Suddenly it dawned on me that the receiver on my home phone didn't even work, so it was time to say goodbye.
I called Verizon to see about keeping the Internet and ridding of the land line. "You'll be without the Internet for 21 days, " the Verizon customer service rep admonished. "Well then I guess I gotta switch to Time Warner, " I threatened. "Okay, " responded the Verizon rep. I hung up in a huff, and immediately called Time Warner. To my surprise, I got through to a customer service representative in a matter of seconds. Things were gonna change. Life was good. But little did I know that by signing up with Time Warner Internet, I was about to be in for the MOST frustrating, anger and sadness-filled time of my life. And I went to Catholic school.
It all started on December 10th. I was anxiously awaiting the arrival of the Time Warner Internet technician between the hours of one and three. One and three? And on a Sunday? This is the best company ever, I thought.
At 2:45pm Jose knocked on my door. He was a nice gentleman who did go out of his way to make sure everything was up and running. He even told me I was being charged too much each month, that I wasn't getting email, and that the download speed was considerably lower than I was promised. Jose was confused by the misinformation I had been given and left me with a customer service number to call so I could clear things up. All in all, a good experience. Poor Jose. Such a nice chap. But now it was up to me to brave the waters of the Time Warner customer service line.
My first post-Internet call was to Monica, who then informed me that even after the monthly charge was "corrected, " I was still being overcharged by $120. Glad they caught that, I thought.
But it is now December 20th, and since the 10th, this is the first day that I have had the Internet work consistently for more than 2 hours. It has gone out numerous times each day since the 10th.
I made many calls to customer service so I could pinpoint the problem, but when warned that the wait would be greater than 30 minutes, I hung up the phone because of other commitments. Finally, on the 14th, I gave in and decided to wait the "greater than 30 minutes." But alas, I couldn't make it past 55 minutes, as my dinner guests had arrived. This was getting out of control.
So today I call Time Warner to get the scoop on a missing remote and the Internet problem. I get through to the cable side immediately, and the remote issue was resolved. Dale explains that he has to transfer me to an Internet technician, so I say that's no big deal and I wait to be connected. For 15 minutes I listen to the same damn hold music, when suddenly I am disconnected. Are you serious? I think. Oh well. I call back.
This time I get through to the Internet tech fairly easily. Her name is Trina. I very calmly tell Trina that something weird has been going on lately, that I just assume it's a fluke, and that I'm sure she has some Adelphia-related explanation for the mishap. I remind Trina a dozen times that my Internet seems to be working okay at the moment, and that I'm guessing there must be some note in the computer about the random outages. Trina then puts me on hold 3 or 4 times and comes back to the line. "Unplug your modem. Hold it for 5 seconds. Then plug it back in, " she says. I comply. "Is your Internet working now?" she asks. "It's been working today, " I remind her, "Remember? It's just that it's gone out every day before today and I really can't afford to have this happen. I mean, I work from home and I need the Internet for my job." "Oh no. That's baaaadddd, " Trina says. "Ah, yeah it is. Is there anything in your computer about the Adelphia change or anything?" I ask. "Yeah, I know there have been some problems with the change, " Trina says to me. At this point I'm beginning to think she's high.
"Trina, " I ask, "Is this something that's going to happen every day? Because if it is, I think I'm going to have to change companies. I'm really sorry, but I just can't afford to be without the Internet all the time." "No. That's bad. But is your Internet working today?" Trina asks. "Wow. This is getting weird, " I say, "What in the world is going on? I mean I think I'm going to have to cancel the service. Can you just tell me what I need to do to cancel the service?" "Ohhhhh, " Trina whispers, "You gotta call the local office to find that out." Defeated, I then ask for the number for the local office, to which Trina responds, "Um, I gotta put you on hold to get that." "That's no problem, " I say. Trina then comes back with the "local" number of which she had spoken, and begins delivering it to me in the softest voice, as if she is about to crack up. "One-Eight-Eight, " she says, and before she can go on I interrupt her. "Wait. That's a local number?" I ask. "Yep, " Trina says. "Okay, " I say, "Go on. Sorry about that." "1-8-8-8 (long pause) 8 (pause) 9 (pause) 2 (pause), " she begins, and I can't believe what I'm hearing. I'm thinking, there's no way she's actually doing this, so I let her continue."2 (pause) 2 (pause) 5 (pause) 3, " she says, and then takes a deep breath."888-TW-CABLE?" I ask, "That's the local number for California?'Cause that's the number I dialed to get to you, Trina. Where are you?" "I'm in British Columbia, " she says, "Is there anything else I can help you with today?" "No, no, Trina. You certainly can't help me with anything, " I say. And then I hang up.
In conclusion, DON'T switch to Time Warner Internet unless you're looking to commit suicide. Their Internet is the WORST, and the customer service hold music sounds like it was composed by a rat.
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