My husband Timothy was in his early 20's when he married Amy because she had become pregnant. My husband's first son, Chad, was born in 1985. A second child, Ashley Nadine Edick, was born in February 1987.
Months later, Tim returned home from work to find Mrs. Housewife porking his friend Mike. Usually a restrained individual, Tim hit Mike and left the house with Chad. He found out that Amy was pregnant again with another man's child.
(not Mike, lucky man #3...)
During the term of Amy's pregnancy with Ashley, she told my husband that Ashley was not his. Tim has a scar from a birthmark on his face: she told him he was a monster and a huge mistake. The last time she visited Chad, she called Tim after and hour and said, "Come pick this f*&$%ing kid up, I can't stand him!" Chad was crying for his daddy and was scared of her.
Even though he was told Ashley was not his, he often babysat BOTH Chad and Ashley together. Tim became worried when he found out that Amy was using child cough syrup to DRUG 2-year old Chad while he visited with his mother.
Tim filed for sole custody of Chad, and as far as we know, Amy completed her desertion of Chad by being a no-show at the custody hearing, and for the next 16 years of his life. Since Tim thought that Ashley was not his and had had it screamed in his face so many times, he did not request a paternity test.
He did not ask for child support for Chad and was quite happy to get great support from both of his parents in raising him. Everyone has their issues, and although he was far from an angel, I can't believe that he was other than a great Dad, then AND now.
We have been married about 2 years, and last year I asked him some questions about Chad's mother and the little girl. I did not even know that he was once married to Amy as he was too ashamed to tell me.
I read him a riot act when I requested a copy of Chad's custody paperwork and instead got back: A termination of parental rights for Ashley Nadine Edick, apparently signed by Tim and BOTH of his parents. A wife he was too ashamed to tell me about and a child that he thought was not his.
Once I finally calmed down and examined the paperwork, I saw that the signature was clearly NOT his; both his mother's and father's signatures had been forged as well, the address to their same residence for the past 50 years was incorrect! Amy Elizabeth Kirwan had had a false representative appear to a notary and terminate Tim's legal rights to Ashley!
Now, the way was clear for Amy to have her new husband, Scott Messner, adopt Amy. It was so easy, since Tim would never have to know.
For 16 years, Chad suffered horrible treatment at the hands of Tim's second wife, who treated Chad like a second-class citizen to her own child, stating, "he's not my problem, he's YOUR kid."
Chad's own mother never wrote or called. She did, however, carry on secret communications with Tim's younger brother, with whom she had previously told Tim she had been having an affair. She even told Tim for a while that Ashley was his brother's!
I have done a pi@-poor job of it, but have tried the best I could for Chad. He broke my heart last year when he told me, "It's ok, I don't really have a mother."
Eighteen year old kids are... Well, eighteen... And problems arose in the house last year, mainly because Chad did not want to find work and was not in school after graduating in May.
I pushed for several months for Chad to at least meet his sister, Ashley. Finally, stupidly, I called Amy and let her know that Chad was interested in talking to Ashley. She agreed to let me know before they made arrangements to meet, as we hoped to keep the parents out of it and just let the two siblings talk. Behind my back, she made plans to meet with Chad - which if fine, Chad was nearly an adult - but it was still very sneaky.
Through other sources, we learned that Ashley was happy with her adoptive father, and in her best interest have so far decided not to take legal action against him or his wife, at least until Ashley is 18. I let Amy know that I knew that there was "some mistake" on the adoptive paperwork, and she became very nervous and never spoke to me again.
Apparently, Ashley loves her "Dad" very much, but I feel sick when I think about how much her REAL dad has been through with fighting for custody for his youngest son from a neglectful mother, and my heart just breaks. I am sure this man loves her, and knowing his wife, I am not convinced that he is aware of her deception. If he is..., well. But if he's not, we can't take a girl from someone she loves and who loves her, right?
All I want is for my husband to be able to tell Ashley WHY. To tell her the truth, she is almost an adult and deserves to hear it straight. Not that it matters, with what she has been through, but to know that she is loved, to know that we know her birthday, that we try to find out everything we can about her, and that we think about her.
I feel really bad about telling Chad all of this about his own "mother, " but it was all totally true, and we asked him to look in his heart and ask himself if he saw any deceit there on our part. I wonder if Amy has told horrible stories about my husband to Ashley - accusing him of deserting Ashley - instead of vice versa. There has been talk recently that Ashley really ISN'T Tim's. Talk about SICK. Why does she have to screw with her head like this, just get a da*ed paternity test! It is obvious that Ashley is the SPITTING IMAGE of her Father - Tim.
Amy had the gall to tell me that my husband was promiscuous - heck, who isn't at 20? I have never known a more devoted husband or father and seem to remember it was HER that couldn't keep her hands off Tim's own BROTHER for chrissake, or his friends! This woman must have such a huge ego that she thinks others can't see around her lies - how it must gall HER that we have her pegged!
Chad is currently living in Pennsylvania with his sister Ashley and his female ovum-donor, Amy. He will be moving out this weekend to move in with his girlfriend, who will hopefully end up being much less manipulative and treat him much better than Amy! (At first we were opposed to it - but it's a lot better than living with a person who is living this HUGE lie!)
After 16 years, it seems that she has succeeded officially in providing Chad with about 6 months' worth of mothering. Great job! But you WILL NEVER BE HIS MOTHER. Mothers don't lie to their kids. Mothers don't desert any of their kids. Mothers don't become manipulative and sneaky in order to deny their children the rightful love and adoration of their real, loving parents. AMY YOU ARE SICK.
I had an opportunity to meet Amy when Chad met her for the first time in 16 years. I saw Ashley standing there and I wanted so bad top get out of the car. I knew that if I did I would say something to this woman and it would cease to be "about" Chad and Ashley being together. I let Chad out and sped away and just sobbed. It was the hardest thing I ever did, but the sight of that woman absolutely turned my stomach - it was like meeting Evil.
Amy, if you read this, go get your Mommy to hire more attorneys for you. Sue me for slander. I have nothing to give other than honesty, and that honesty will pierce you, consume you, and render you helpless in the face of Justice.
Hopefully, someday, she will be held responsible for her actions... If not by man, then by her Maker. I know that he will be interested in hearing her explanation, too.
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