My wife and I FINALLY went on the Ramada Resort Vacation I had bought years ago.
(1998)
After waiting in line for an hour to pick up a little underpowered 'windbreaker car' a Hundai, we drove for what seemed like forever to get to the cheesy Ramada Hotel.
We arrived at the run-down dingy hotel, with an unmade room, where wet towels were on the floor and the ironing board and trash filled the bathroom.
After having fresh linens sent up, we made our own beds and got some much needed sleep, as the hotel is in the middle of NOWHERE.
The place was a dump, and we looked forward to the cruise, planning on using the hotel to simply sleep in. Sleep was hard to catch as the non smoking room reeked of old cigarettes.
The 'vacation' was supposed to include 3 days in Orlando "bore-lando" would be more appropriate a cruise to the Bahamas, and finally 3 days in Ft. Lauderdale.
Not really being into theme parks, we explored the town, ate and planned to leave for better experiences on the boat. Having been on a few West Coast cruises to Mexico,
I had some idea of what to expect.
The ship was an older ship, but even the worst of the ship was far better than the hotels. Except for the DJs, they were pretty weak. The food however was good and abundant.
Again, I had bought this package in 1998 and it looked like everything on the vacation was old when I bought the package. We saw Nassau and Freeport, and while somewhat fun, Tijuana is comparable.
It's several hours drive from Orlando to Ft Lauderdale, and at best it's a boring drive. Upon arrival at the 'welcome center' a fast talking jackass spoke a mile a minute, scribbled onto a map, demanded 40 bucks for a time share tour and dismissed us.
Not really wanting to go to timeshare, but resigned to saying no, eating the free food and looking forward to driving the South Beach, Miami, we left.
Our second hotel had a whole 2.5 star rating! I guess the first one was a. 5 star rating.
The recently taken over former best western had filthy rugs, and a recently repaired and re-papered wall, but it had a better pool, no cigarette stench, and was only 30 minutes from Miami and close to a few decent places to eat.
Ironically there was an auction going on of items formerly owned by a telemarketer scammer, who made millions bilking people with false long distance charges, when he wasn't busy raping and molesting young boys. (this was according to a newspaper article at the entrance to the auction).
We were able to sleep at the second hotel, and I made it a point to wear flip flops at all times, to avoid the nasty carpets.
We spent our days at South beach, except for a few wasted hours at the time share which was cheesy. The Emcee was so rehearsed he was laughable and phony.
The 'closer' a guy named Cosmo wore polyester, and was a piece of work himself. Finally, some slutty looking lady with colored contacts, an obscure accent, straw for hair,
and an attitude tried to close us, but we said NO. "Have a nice life" she said.
My wife wanted to give her the finger and say something more, but we took our 40 bucks back and left, ready for the 'riverboat cruise'.
The riverboat cruise was thankfully a 'bonus' and while not bad, it was cheesy. The food was however not bad. We were fed mounds of ribs, potatoes, chicken and bread. They came around several times. The 'Vegas Type" show was more akin to Bill Murray doing a lounge act, but we laughed and had fun.
I would not recommend this vacation package to anyone with any standards, anyone used to better hotels, nicer cruises, or nicer parts of the country.
We were truly slumming it. We videotaped quite a bit of it, named it our 'cheesy' vacation, and will be sending a photo of me giving the finger to the slutty looking saleswoman at the timeshare
Matt
Redondo Beach, California
U.S.A.
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