I recently joined Eharmony, having paid their very expensive month long membership fee, which, by the way, was renewed without my consent. At first, I received a number of matches. Out of that bunch, I met a total of two men, one of whom seemed a bit on the emotionally unstable side.
That number of matches quickly went down to zero. When I inquired with customer service as to what was going on, I received form email after form email, all claiming that the reason I wasn't receiving more matches was because they are so "stringent" in how they qualify matches and I need to just be "patient" and know that the process is working as it should.
I am a very attractive woman in her early thirties who has no difficulty whatsoever finding men to date (finding that right person has proved more elusive, however), including many attractive men I have met via Match.com. On Match, there is a natural way of communicating with a person - actually communicating directly with them, as well as being provided quite a lot of background info on that person to see whether there is enough common ground to pursue a conversation.
On Eharmony, I find the "structure" they impose on "getting to know" each other to be totally arbitrary. There is either totally irrelevant information (the questions you are supposed to send each other) or way too much information ("can't stands and must haves") exchanged. For example, I was once "matched" with someone I already had known quit well in real life who happened to be one of the most verbally abusive men I have come across in my entire singles dating experience (and I have a lot of dating experience). Not that it necessarily matters, but he also happens to be completely deaf, which makes communication extremely different.
They claim to be so effective in matching people up and yet, have you noticed that on their advertisements they keep trotting out the same five or so couples?
As others have mentioned on complaint, I believe Eharmony hides behind the concept of their "system" to prevent members from seeing what is actually going on. It is absolutely true that people are sent as "matches" who are not paying members of the service and therefore they are not able to respond, and, even worse, you're not given the oppportunity to know why this person has not chosen write to you.
I believe their claim of using a 29 facet compatibiltiy test is compeletely bogus, as others here have claimed, they're simply matching you with whomever is in your stated preferences. As someone else had mentioned, I also found it offensive that they don't allow you to adjust the age range of potential matches - who are they to tell me what age range I should accept? It seems obvious that they are simply trying to broaden the range of people they can send to you as "matches" because if they really let you choose the age range of your choosing, that would far reduce the number of people they can send your way.
Also, what's up with the people whose profiles indicate they are choosing to reveal their photo at a "later stage of the process" - don't people have a right to view who they are corresponding with? We are talking about dating where there needs to be some level of initial physical attraction.
As another person had mentioned on this site, Eharmony seems to have no qualms rejecting people as members who would be considered very attractive to anyone else, it would seem for the reason that they are not religious enough.in the Bay Area, there are many people who do not have religion as a significant part of their lives and this seems a ridiculous reason to deem someone too "unmatchable." I know in real life two attractive and intelligent people Eharmony declined, one of whom is a very well known public speaker in the Bay Area - extremely pretty, intelligent and accomplished. She is too "unmatchable" for them?
I, too, believe EHarmony to be simply a scam that tries to portray itself as a more "sophisticated" method of finding the right person. I must admit that their advertising is very effective. However, people would be better off to save their money and search elsewhere for a mate.
Sincerely
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