Six years ago I had an auto accident that wrecked my life. Left me permanatly disabled. @ first the doctors kept putting me off work in 3-6months time frames. Until about a year to two years ago when my doctor said that was crazy it ghas been six years and I only get worse.
I have a host of muscle and bone diseases. I have days where I can not walk, I fall all the time and break bones, My oldest son is the primary care taker of my other children because I just can not lift them. I have veruy limited use of my hands, the open and release things at times on there own, no strength. I have migraines that literatly make me pass out on the floor. Panic attacks, which i believe are from the stress of it all not just the pain.
Before my accident I worked alot.in four years of employment at my last job I missed less than a weeks worth of work. I had a baby and missed 3 days. My job before that I was at 9 years. All my work history goes this same way, but they make it sound like I enjoy lossing everything, having no control over my llife.
Its gotten to the point I am worth more dead than alive for my children. The first denial I had a suicide attempt, but Isadly did not have enough strength for the knife to meet my heart and stomach as planned. I just bled alot cried laying in a pool of blood for hours before I was found.
It did not take long for the lack of income to destroy our lives, we lost our home in three months. Was not much but I bought it and busted my ass for it. The father of my children gets us houses, but the end result is we loss it again in a matter of months. We have 5 children. He has left us because he can not take being my caretaker and the burden of thw whole load.
My friends all vanished. Saying things like it is emotionally draining watching me suffer. Who wants to hang out with someone who can't do anthing or go any where. I have completly lost myself. I don't know me anymore. I used to be fun, have fun, enjoy life. Now I pray to just die and end it all.
Had a hearing yest. The lawyer says your age is a problem, most people don't have your health issues until in the 60-70 age range. So what. If I was 70 I would be approved, but because I am screwed up at 32 screw me.
The vocational expert says I can work in a factory loading a machine and pushing a button. Funny when I can not bend have use of only one are, can't stand lonnger than 10mins, walk for 5, sit for 20, and hello all those meds I am on say do nbot operate machinary, of course my lawyer did not speak up. So my family is currently homeless and I am waiting another 30day in this 6 year nightmare to hear how I am denied because of my age.
I even tried going to work a couple years back, although noty released, lasted a few weeks before I fell and got hurt worse. Maybe we should have a choice about paying into ssi, beings they play games with your life.
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