Raymond and I have 2 children together. When we were married he was abusive and I finally had him removed by the sherriff.
After that we decided to remain friends for the kids sake. He said he would pay the rent and continue helping out. After about 3 months, the landlord came to me and told me that he hadn't been paying the rent but said that he would make up all arrears if the landlord would kick me out. I was able to get the rent taken care of, and stayed there for another year.
Since then, he has been court ordered to pay $485.00 a month, which I haven't seen a penny of, that was 2 1/2 years ago.
Two summers ago I let the kids stay with him for a month while I was relocating, when I went to get my kids he wouldn't give them and I had to go to court to get a restraining order against him just to get them back. When he showed up for the hearing we could smell the tequila on him from the next table. I was granted a 3 year restraing order.
I moved up to WA last year, since I couldn't afford to stay in California. We came to Washington because my boyfriend is a commercial fisherman and there is alot of work up here.
I have told Raymond that if he wants to see the kids he needs to send me $200.00 for me to bring them down, and the same for me to get them back, unless he wants to come and get them himself. This is while there is a restraining order in effect!
He told them that he would get them last summer, and never even called again! I finally called him in December and asked him why he didn't send his son a birthday present, he said to me and them that he would send birthday presents and christmas gifts. He never did.
When I called in January asking him why he didn't he said he did but they got returned - I live in a town with a 2000 population, and the post office dosent send stuff back if you are a po box holder and something was sent to you with an incorrect po box #. They will put a note in your box informing you of it.
Also he was able to send our daughter a gift in May with no problems.
He said he would send it again if I would give him my physical address, but unless I gave him that he wouldn't send it.
He has told the kids that he does pay child support but that since I moved out of the state that it keeps getting sent back to him - that it is too far to send money, its against the law, but if I move back then he would be allowed to give money again.
He is a drunk and an abusive man, I don't care if I never hear from him again, and only ask that he give up parental rights or start acting like a parent, emotionally as well as financially.
Bernadette
Westport, Washington
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