Cellulean is a hoax. The product is sticky, gooey, and completely ineffective. Worse than that, the company stealthily charged me for additional supplies of their repugnant product, and when I called to resolve the dispute, a 'team leader' smugly assured me that there would be no refund because I had agreed to monthly shipments when I requested the free trial. It's clear that the company makes its profits by deliberately constructing the appearance of a one-time transaction that nightmarishly becomes a long-term commitment. They certainly couldn't turn a profit on the strength of their product. And, by the way, the name of the company's owner is a SECRET, or so I was told by the representative. Well, not a complete secret. It's Patrick... Something. It's the surname that must remain classified. They could tell me... But then they'd have to kill me, I'm sure.
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