What can I say? When you are a divorced father, you are treated by the courts as a criminal first. It doesn't matter if you are a good father or a bad one.
First, the crooked and unethical attorneys make their money. And please don't tell me there is any such thing as a GOOD attorney. I would gotten just as much, or just as little, as I did with or without an attorney. Then you get assigned a CASE number, which kind of feels to me like an inmate number. Going through a divorce as a man today, sort of reminds me of the way this country used to put blacks through slavery and prejudism for over a hundred years; obviously not quite to that extreme. Nonetheless, we look back it now and see the flaws of our country back then but it took years for us as a country to overcome and admit our mistakes.
We are doing the same thing now. Society knows how important it is for a father to be part of child's life, especially a boy. It's a proven fact that boys without fathers are more likely to end up in prison and experience a lot of issues in their lives; emotional and such. Yet the courts do everything in their power to limit a father's role in their child's lives.
My son's mother makes more money than I do. I have him half the week and I have joint and legal custody; yet I pay her child support. NOTE: they get you on the word DOMICILE. They don't know what you and you child's mother have arranged but they like to throw that word out there to make them feel important. And, as if that is bad enough, in order to pay the child support, I work two jobs and must have a babysitter watch him in the early evenings while I work my second job. That's the part that kills me the most. She can have the money but I want to be able to spend some real quality time with my son but I can't.
As a result, I have a 10 year old little boy that has become aggressive at school, developed emotional problems, he's starting to tell lies, and he is stuck sitting in a two bedroom apartment an entire weekend. All in all, he's still a great kid but his dad isn't such a great dad any more. His dad, is tired and stressed almost all the time and sometimes snaps. More importantly, I am bitter. I used to take pride in being a good father. I know now that as far as the courts are concerned, the phrase 'good father' is a oxymoron.
Then when you try and talk to a Friend of the Court officer, they treat you like are beneath them. Last time, the referee calls the court bailiff to arrest me because she didn't like my 'tone of voice'.
And if you need to file a motion, it cost you $100 so that you can stand before some joker in a black gown and listen to him/her shoot their mouth off for 5-10 minutes. Mind you, you're supposed to be taking care of your child, but the court feels that it is more important to get that $100 out of you than have you feed your child.
To make a long story short, the children suffer and the courts don't care. I know too many fathers that love their children but just couldn't fight the good fight anymore and ended up leaving the state, country or stop seeing their children. I used to think it was only a bad father that would do that but I know now that's not always the case.
Shame on you macomb county friend of the court
Kirk
Wixom, Michigan
U.S.A.
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